Discovering the God of life, health and Pregnancy

I've come to the honest realization that I don't have time/don't make time to blog. It's been over a year since my last post and a thousand apologies to you all. I had wonderful aspirations when Derek's and I's life together began that I would share with you all the joys and the pains of marriage and that in some small way it might help other married couples navigate through the small and big things they face. The reality I found was that most of our fights I was too embarrassed by to share with the internet (though our following was small) and I had no real positive conclusions to offer. Now looking back over our past 19 months of marriage the only helpful and yet slightly disappointing piece of advice I can give is that if you are both earnestly seeking Christ in every aspect then every aspect of your marriage will be richer. I say this advice could be disappointing because it's a much harder thing to achieve then it sounds and I know many out there would love to know the "secret" to an amazing marriage. Well, there just is no "secret" that I have discovered. There is only an overpowering truth that is revealed to us over and over and over again. I can tell when my husband has not been spending time with God, from the wisdom or lack of that comes out of his mouth to the love and affection he may or may not show me. When I am lacking in my relationship with Christ I slowly become overwhelmed with self righteous thoughts and my tongue becomes lose with hurtful words. Yes, like so many others I thought we would have an easy road ahead but God quickly revealed to us how severely we needed to choose him every day if we wanted this to not only work but be everything he meant for it to be; the most important relationship on earth, exemplify his love for us and be a display case for his character.

After 3 months of trying we have been blessed with another opportunity to share God's blessings with the world. I bet you can guess what it is....... yep, I'm pregnant! Today I am 15 weeks and the baby's due date is September 20th. The past 10 weeks have been the hardest weeks of my life to date. Women who are reading this who have been trying to get pregnant for a long time please understand that my heart goes out to you and I cannot imagine the pain you must be going through. I am simply offering my experience with this pregnancy and how God is changing my heart in these months. Many of you who know me well know that I have a passion for active and healthy living (that may be an understatement). I imagined that when I became pregnant I would not give in to unhealthy temptations, always make time to exercise and be an example for all pregnant women out there. To say the least I have been VERY humbled.
My best friend had her first baby in August and I have reminisced often of our conversations we had during her first trimester. I remember her saying that she was ravenously hungry all the time and nothing seemed to satisfy her. I said I would give her a list of high protein foods that should help keep her fuller longer and would also be easy on her queasy tummy. I laugh at that conversation now because in my first trimester my food aversions and nausea was so strong that no foods on that list would have appealed to me. I hated the smell of bananas, peanut butter, Derek's homemade smoothies and most vegetables. For a long time I lived off of chicken noodle soup, crackers, popcorn, life savers and Baked Lays. My exercise habits went from 5 days a week of rigorous weight and cardio training to nothing. Every time I went up a flight of stairs I had to stop and catch my breath. When I would simply go for a walk it was followed by a long nap. I laugh now as I tell you this but at the time it was horrible!

My first experience with the pregnant me was when I was 6 weeks pregnant and decided to go for a 6 mile run. This is a distance that I did weekly and was fairly easy for me to accomplish. I chose a scenic yet somewhat hilly route and I was excited to give my pregnant body a try at some distance running. I accomplished the first 3 miles with slightly less ease than usual but that could be mean it simply was an "off" day. As I was climbing up a hill at mile 4 and feeling almost completely exhausted I had the great realization that this pregnancy was going to be a journey. It would be like most journeys; hard, grueling, and maybe even moments of regret. At that point I realized none of my health and fitness expertise would help make this journey easier. In fact God told me right there, as I made my way to the top of the hill, He was the only one on whom I could rely. I could not rely on Derek to always say and do what I needed, though he makes great efforts and strides. I could not rely on my mother or my sister to always give the advice I needed to hear. Most of all I could not rely on my own judgement to do this pregnancy thing right.

Over the next few weeks I made more time for God. I spent more time praying and reading the Bible. I consulted him more and more as the nausea worsened and the food aversions intensified. He revealed so much to me and continues to do so throughout this pregnancy journey. The largest revelation I had were my idols. I was putting fitness and healthy eating above his desires for my body. I placed my workouts ahead of my alone time with God. As many of you know there are tons of diets and recommended eating lifestyles out there and I never or rarely consulted him on which was best for me. I spent the past 19 months learning how God was the god of our marriage but never made him the god of my health.
"For life is more than food, and the body more than clothes." Luke 12:23
He is the ultimate fitness and health guru. No scientist on earth knows my body or anyone else' body better than He does. Now, as our baby grows and I am blessed with the gift of experiencing the miracle of life, God is teaching me how he is the God of life and the God of growth.
"For the bread of God is the bread that comes down from heaven and gives life to the world." John 6:33

I would like to say that I will be updating you all on our pregnancy experiences and show off pictures of my big belly but I'll be more realistic and say I probably won't. I would love to be better at blogging among other things, calling my friends and family more often, replying to emails in a timely manner and sending holiday and thank you cards. I will try to post pictures on facebook and give pregnancy updates through my status. However I won't shut down the blog just yet. Once this little guy or gal (we're keeping it a surprise) is born I won't be working and just maybe....MAYBE, I'll make more time to blog.

"Laughing Your Way to a Better Marriage"

I know it's been sometime since I've given everyone an update on the Petersens and my last post strayed from the whole goal of this blog; to share our joys and frustrations with our families and friends as we begin this most blessed journey of life called marriage. I'm sure most have heard or read how increasingly high divorce rates are in our society. I know every broken relationship has it's story but from what I know and continue to learn is that in most marriages the common root of all trouble is selfishness and fear. One seems to feed into the other and Derek and I have encountered both more often than anticipated since we've been married. We think so often that if it weren't for Christ in us and for our blessed friends and family around us we could see how easily and quickly a blissful marriage could turn sour. It has helped and encouraged me so many times when a confided friend tells me "You are normal." "This is normal." "Your battles and frustrations are not new and have been successfully dealt with before." I'm not sure about the rest of you but this makes all the difference to me. Somehow if I know that what I'm experiencing is "normal", whatever that is, then I can embrace the situation humble myself and press on. So that's why I blog about our life as newly weds. All couples need to know that they are normal and whatever they are facing can be fixed and hope as well as a renewed love for one another can be found. However with that goal in mind I will never share "too much" and if I'm blogging about it then you know it has been resolved and we both are able to laugh about whatever the issue was.
Speaking of laughter our Life Group, a group of friends we meet with on Sunday nights for fellowship beyond church, has just started a video series called "Laugh Your Way to a Better Marriage" with Pastor Mark Gungor who has an interesting way of portraying the differences between women and men. In the first video "The Tale of Two Brains" he described the difference between the brains of the two sexes and what motivates one to the other despite the difference. The guy is hilarious which made the 70 minute video seem like 30 and I cannot wait to see what's in store for us next week. He described the male brain as a bunch of organized boxes that are put in a specific place, only one box can be opened at a time and none of them can ever touch when they are in their designated areas of the brain. Men also have one box that has nothing in it and it's their favorite box. Then he went on to describe how men are very good at thinking and doing nothing for long periods of time but also have the ability to concentrate very well on just one thing which is what women generally struggle with. He exaggerated a lot in his message which is part of what made it so funny. He described the female brain as a thick bed of wires all connected to each other and intricately intertwined so that all thoughts and tasks occur in multiples; multiple thoughts, topics and actions can be performed at one time which is something that would make a man's mind explode. There are good and bad associated with both along with their lists of strengths and weaknesses.
Derek and I don't really feel more informed having watched and heard this message. We've heard the general ideas many times from various books and in numerous premarriage counseling classes however we have never heard it presented in such a comical fashion. Listen up all married couples, no matter how new or old your marriage is the more you laugh at yourselves with your spouse the better off your marriage will be! Now I have a lot to learn about marriage and am far from an expert but this I know to be true. Just in the last month or so Derek and I have discovered that rather than get frustrated and annoyed with one another and our differences it's so much more therapeutic and effective to poke fun at eachother's personality defects as long as both know them to be true. Now when Derek doesn't do the dishes I can say something like "Plan on cleaning the kitchen sometime this marriage?" and he will laugh and say "I guess if I want to stay married I will." then like magic, he does! No more begrudging thoughts and knots in the throat caused by the thought that dirty dishes tells me he wants to be a bachelor, which means he doesn't value my efforts, which means marriage is painful for him and........ do you see how the wires in my female brain are connected? One thinks that they are a reasonable enough person to never let such thoughts infiltrate their minds but at some point or some season of life our thoughts sound psychotic if said out loud. Anyway my point is that laughing at oneanother's differences is always better than resentment.
Ever tell a story of an argument between you and your significant other to a friend and you both just end up laughing? Ever wonder why you couldn't laugh when it was happening? Derek and I still argue and still about dumb things but they are much fewer and further between. We have begun to argue and then just end up laughing even though we're trying to be serious. Sometimes I want to be mad at him but in the few amounts of wisdom I've gained since we begun our marriage I've learned how little good that will do and if everyone else can laugh about our stories and personality defaults then why can't we?
Pastor Gungor described the reason God made male and female brains so differently which is to ensure that one will constantly be serving the other in order to receive what he or she desires. I won't go into detail about this but he's saying that Men desire sex and in order to get that they have to serve their wives and women desire love and appreciation but in order to get those they have to give their husbands sex. Beyond that explanation I think God also created these differences because in working to better understand the person that is our ultimate companion and the closest to our hearts as a default we will better understand those we come in contact with every day as well as our families and children. Being in this constant relationship of servitude doesn't just make us better husbands and wives but also better people who were given the ultimate purpose of serving other for Christ's glory. This is why God ordained marriage and made it this wonderful and most awful gift, so that we would be constantly corrected and working towards becoming a stronger people for a larger purpose beyond a better marriage.

The Resolutions

As a personal trainer the term "Resolutions" is used often in reference to those who will rejoin the gym or start a membership for the first time after the first of the year. Unfortunately those of us who work at the gym or are persistent goers, know we will see over 70% of the new faces no more when spring time rolls around and some won't even make it that long. This is a booming time of year for the fitness industry. I know it's horrible to make loot off of others vulnerability and insecurities however if fitness is your livelihood then you had better take advantage of this time of year or you will be left in the dust. My first supervisor as a personal trainer used to motivate us by saying the training you sell now will pay your bills the rest of this year and that was so true. I remember doing fitness assessment after fitness assessment hoping and praying during each one that they would sign a contract and I'd be able to pay rent. At that first club where I worked I probably signed about 1 out of every 10 or 15 fitness assessments I took new members through. I started work in January of 2010 and instantly started working 60+ hour weeks until mid February. As much as I absolutely hated all those hours, and all the people who didn't purchase training I missed it by the end of February. If I couldn't sell hardly any training in January with all the complimentary workouts I was giving then how would I sell if I did less than half the amount just a month later?! This is when I learned that the personal training business is not for me. As my husband once put it, "You are at the mercy of the public." Many trainers have built up rapport of many years and can now make an ok living off of their training and live a mostly normal life. Some of the things I do love about the work is that I have complete control over my schedule and business. Not to mention I am doing what I LOVE as work! Not many people can say they are passionate about their job but I definitely am. I truly believe that outside of faith in Christ having a healthy lifestyle full of lots of physical activity and good nutrition is the key to an energetic life full of great fulfillment but I won't step up on my soap box about that, since you all know exactly why plenty of exercise and a wholesome diet are better than the alternative. Being passionate about our work is one thing all trainers have in common. No one does this for the money or the great hours and benefits. It is simply because they absolutely love it and will devote their lives to helping people realize and live out this very difficult but so obvious truth. Notice I said "very difficult"..... yes, I know it's hard to fit it in your life, yes.... I know healthy food doesn't taste good..... and yes, I know not everyone can afford a personal trainer; afterall it is considered a luxury. Believe me all of us trainers have heard every excuse in the book and it keeps us sane to vent to one another. I'm not trying to bash or create shame and guilt but to elude to the fact that your trainer does exactly what you fear.....complains about their clients. Don't get me wrong, we love you and want you to succeed. Compare it to complaining about a family member; you love them but sometimes if they say that one thing one more time, you are going to jump out the window! You all know what I'm talking about. So to keep ourselves sane and from letting it all boil over on you, the client, us trainers will frequently complain about the most recent new member we gave a workout to;
"he was a "usedtobe"" or "his work schedule is too erratic" or "she has never eaten breakfast and cannot imagine starting now" and there are plenty of other norms out there. My least favorite is, "Are you sure this exercise will get rid of my pouch?" or any other doubt they may have in my program. Isn't it enough that I have my Kinesiology/Exercise Physiology degree from a Big10 school or that I am certified from a Nationally Accredited Institution? Some people just take more convincing I guess. Do I feel guilty about my lack of grace or mercy for the generally inactive population who doubt my expertise? Definitely. I often feel like behind closed doors I am not patient enough with my clients and I need to be less like Jillian Micheals and more like the Bob...... whatever his last name is. I often think that just because I know something so well that I could teach it in my sleep, everyone else does too. Now maybe you're not a personal trainer but those of you out there who are very highly trained and educated in your practice can relate: "If one more student asks me why they need to know math, I'm going to....", "If one more kid tries to lie to me about his criminal record....." or "If one more......" put your own story in there. What's your day to day annoyance with the general public?
Mine was brought up to me in a very obvious way this morning as I read the story of Moses and the burning bush. This is one you probably know very well. Even those of you who don't have a religion have probably heard of it or had it read to you at some point in your life. Refresh yourself; Exodus 4. The gist of the story is that God wants to use Moses to free his people, the Israelites. Not only does God use a flaming bush, which doesn't actually burn up, to get Moses' attention, he shows him 2 miracles, not including the bush trick, to convince a reluctant Moses of how serious he his about this mission. Then when Moses is still whining about the potential barriers, he gives him more miraculous signs, and a companion, Aaron. As I read this I was like, "Really, Moses! You are talking to The God! Why are you arguing? Aren't you honored to take on this challenge in his name? Shut your mouth and do what he says. He has way more experience and wisdom than you do in ALL areas so why put up the fight?" God is thinking the same thing because he says,
"Who gave man his mouth? Who makes him deaf or mute? Who gives him sight or makes him blind? Is it not I, the Lord? Now go; I will help you speak and will teach you what to say."
There it is, a list of God's degrees, certifications and loads of experience, but Moses still argues with him and is so afraid of overcoming his barrier of speech and facing potential death that nothing seems to be a comfort.
I put myself in God's shoes as the personal trainer with the very stubborn client before I realized that I can actually better relate to Moses. How many times in my life have I only seen my road blocks and not God and his credentials? Unfortunately way too often. God is saying to me, "Really? Do you know who I am?" Then he reminds me of all the ways he has saved my life and rescued me from death and destruction and promises to always do so. His grace is infinite. I don't need to quote a verse to show you. There are verses all over the Bible just open it up and I'm sure after a few pages of reading you will see that promise written out for you, again and again and again.
My New Year's Resolution is to be more patient and graceful with the "Resolutions" just as God is continuously patient and graceful with me and all my doubts. Now making a second New Year's Resolution to never doubt God is very overwhelming and instead I'll make a daily resolution to surrender my burdens, fears and all other road blocks at his feet where they will not take my focus away from him and his purpose for my life.

Our First Christmas

When I tell people that this is Derek and I's first Christmas together as husband and wife I get a lot of "awwwww, how lovely". Very few people say "Oh what an adventure this year will be" or "I hope you don't have any expectations" which ought to be the most common responses. Of course I had tons of expectations of plenty warm and fuzzy moments full of kisses by our beautifully lit Christmas tree, snuggling up together with hot chocolate by our fireplace and spending quality time while shopping for our friends and family. Those of you who have been married for atleast a year now are giggling as you read this. Outside of married life Christmas isn't always as warm and fuzzy as the carols describe and lets just be honest, very few families actually look forward to spending a whole day together. I've said a number of prayers asking for God's grace and forgiveness in advance before stepping foot in a family member's door for this most blessed time of year. As much as I look forward to Christmas and all it's traditions I can recall a many Christmas's when cutting down the tree was not as fun as I thought it would be and neither was decorating it. Driving long hours to spend the day with family was rather painful and taxing on everyone and after it was all said and done our family needed a vacation from our "vacation". So why, you're wondering, did I expect my first Christmas with my husband to be anything less than all the busy, tumultuous, and chaotic Christmas's before? When I figure that out I'll let you all know.
Our Christmas celebration began with our Christmas tree. I grew up on a farm in Illinois and have always decorated a real Christmas tree that usually my dad and I drove almost an hour to find and cut down. It was your traditional farm family Christmas. Dad would put a fire in the fire place that night and mom and I along with whoever of my siblings were home would help decorate. There were tasty treats sitting out for us to snack on and It's a Wonderful Life would usually be playing in the background. Decorating the tree is my favorite Christmas tradition and it took me a few weeks to even convince Derek that we were going to get a real tree. He always thought I was joking until one evening I brought it up for the 10th time and he understood that I was serious and said something like, "I just don't think that's feasible right now". I began to cry. My family members reading this right now are wincing, I'm sure. Bless his heart he had no idea how very important this was to me. Regardless the tears did the trick. He apologized almost immediately and explained that he just wasn't sure logistically how we were going to get a live tree into our apartment but if it meant that much to me we would find a way to make it work. He was probably right too. His mini cooper is not equipped to haul a live ever green and my Santa Fe is barely suitable. We didn't have a stand or very many ornaments, a tree topper, lights or a tree skirt. The only thing we did have going for us are tall ceilings in our average size apartment in the middle of suburbia.
So we planned a weekend to go to a tree farm and eventhough I didn't think he searched and planned as aggressively as he could've we did find a weekend and a time to go. It was a Saturday afternoon and that evening we were hosting an ugly sweater Christmas party and all our friends were coming over around 7pm. In Overland Park it was probably about 32 degrees that day but out on the flats of Kansas it felt like 15 and the wind was merciless. We spent almost an hour at the first place but had no luck. As it turns out this was the last year for that particular tree farm so they were completely picked over. We decided to leave empty handed. I was disappointed and once more the tears came. This time it didn't take tears for my knight to save the day. He was more determined than I was to find his girl her real evergreen for Christmas. I was ok with giving up and going back to prepare for the party eventhough I was bummed I knew I needed to be reasonable about my expectations. Derek however drove us around in an area he barely knew until we stumbled across another tree farm that looked very promising. Once again we carried around a saw in the freezing wind and dropping temperatures until we found our perfect tree and he was more than tolerant with my indecisiveness in the final decision. He seemed to be actually enjoying the time together and always asked me atleast 3 times, "Are you sure?" I'm certain there were moments he wished he hadn't asked and just cut but nonetheless we eventually found our tree and he cut down his first tree like he had done it every Christmas for years. As we drove away with a new tree stand, and our first Christmas tree as husband and wife tied to the roof of the Santa Fe we were both cheerful despite our frozen hands and cheeks and he even thought out loud that owning a Christmas Tree Farm in our retirement would be kinda fun. We barely had enough time to get ready for our party and put our tree in the stand before our guests arrived. The next day we decorated it with new lights, a big bow for the topper and the 20 ornaments we've acquired from family and friends growing up. Decorating it was definitely another opportunity for growth as it was less than the blissful day I had envisioned but I'll let you use your imagination about that since this post is already quite longer than the others. It's certainly not as beautiful as I envisioned but we've enjoyed many kisses next to it and our cat, Stella, frequently drinks it's water and ventures up it's branches. It hasn't fallen over yet, cross your fingers.
It's funny how once you get married you feel as if you instantly know your spouse so well and then events like Christmas come around and it's brought to your attention that you don't know them very well at all. There is always opportunities to grow in marriage and that's exactly how Derek and I have come to view our differences. Just as we did as single people when we faced trials and road blocks, we considered them opportunities to grow in our faith with Christ, and we did. He made sure of it. Now, as Christ has commanded us to liken our relationship with our spouse to that with him, we do the same as before and grow in faith and love when Christmas isn't always what we envisioned.

So How's Married Life?

If you are recently married you have heard this questions a lot.... "How's married life?" and I feel like it is one of those questions that could elicit a number of inappropriate responses; "It's been hell.", "The sex is awesome!", "Not what I thought it would be." and what I usually want to say "How much time do you have?". Naturally, being the proper people that Derek and I are we usually just nod our heads and say, "Good". When his oldest sister asked us this question, with genuine concern, in a recent email I wasn't sure how to reply. She is actually one of the few people I would feel comfortable being completely honest with and was very touched that she had thought of us but Derek and I promised eachother not to share too much of our relationship issues with family. They explained this more fully in premarriage counseling but it comes down to taking sides. I don't want my family to dislike Derek for any unfair reason and the same goes for his side. So when I received this email from his sister I asked him if I should be honest with her. His response was,
"Why not? What do you plan on saying?"
"Well, should I tell her in all honesty how things have been?"
"Has it really been that horrible?"
This was the morning after a week of very subtle but painful arguing. We didn't lived together before we were married so I'm still getting used to his habits and vice versa. It's also tough learning how to balance romance with business. Those of you who have been married awhile, especially the women, are nodding their heads in agreement. All of our annoyances with one another, which we tried so hard to keep quiet about in order to avoid an argument, all came out with overwhelming emotion as we were getting ready to go to a costume party on Friday night. Some how, being the reasonable and calm people we are (sarcasm), we heard eachother out, discussed our issues and complaints, then kissed and made up.... but not completely. I received the email from his sister the Saturday morning after all this and I'll continue on our previous conversation:
"Well, kind of..."
Derek so lovingly and humbly replied,"We may argue and not always see eachother accurately but I still love being married to you. I'd rather be married to you than not married to you despite our disagreements."
All I could say was "Me too."
Then, when the emotions weren't running so high and we were both feeling alittle more safe, we elaborated and discussed further the issues that arose the previous evening, which as I mentioned earlier had been building up for some time. After that it was like I was in a whole new marriage.

They warned us about this in premarriage counseling and most married couples we know told us "If you work hard at it, it's the best thing ever." or "It's hard work but it's worth it." I didn't understand that until I was there and living it. I felt that way about most of the things we learned in PMC (premarriage counseling). I thought "of course, I'll respect him, I'll never nag at him... that's not my personality, if I don't feel the love and romance I'll just tell him, I don't know why everyone makes this sound so hard." Hahaha, makes me laugh now but there I was less than a month into the marriage and I had done or not done all those things. Sometimes when we have a disagreement we say "Don't you remember that from PMC?" and he has even jokingly said to me "Were you even there?". But because of pmc and Christ at the center of our relationship we have been able to resolve everything that has waged war in us mostly pain free. I do agree with him... I would much rather be married to him than not and I'll go even further and affirm you all that there have been more highs than lows. Derek is an amazing husband who honors my deepest needs and entertains my crazy ideas out of sheer love and affection. He tells me I'm a great wife and most of the time I honor and respect him they way he needs. However, we've only been married a month and a half and I know we haven't seen the last of our boxing rounds but just like anything else in life it's not about avoiding mistakes and just trying to make it work. It's about honoring God, loving one another and giving grace when you have the chance. I find the more grace and love Derek and I give one another the less I care about his annoying habits therefore the less I nag and the more romance and adoration I receive.

So for those of you who have been wondering how married life has been for us.. there you have it. We have learned just as you all warned us that it's not easy, infact it's very hard work but we haven't killed eachother yet. In fact overall by God's grace and his strength in us we absolutely love doing life together :)

Jamican Smile

The alarm went off at 4am on Monday the 27th and we had a plane leaving for our honemoon destination, Monetgo Bay in Jamica, in just a few hours. Despite the fact that the past week was the most chaotic week of our lives to date, which ended with the most blessed weekend of our lives, we bounded out of bed that morning because we knew that salty water, sandy beaches, and endless drinks and sunshine awaited us. Our bags were packed and we couldn't wait to leave this chilly fall morning behind. We arrived plenty early for our flight and had very little complications in the total 7 hour travel time. When we arrived in Jamaica and got ourselves through all the legalities of traveling internationally we were greeted with cheery smiles, booze and rain... lots and lots of rain. It rained for almost 4 days straight; to quote Forest Gump "It rained sideways, big ol' fat rain, and rain that seemed to come straight up from underneath." It didn't get cold so I still got to wear my cute island dresses and we sat outside in the hot tub with fun islandlike drinks and tried to pretend it wasn't raining. The drinking helped. The resort staff was great inspite of the weather. They came up with tons of indoor activities. Derek and I did some fun couples games, bracelet making (lol) and shopping with the vendors that came ashore the resort to sell their stuff. I got 2 awesome necklaces and learned how to barter, which is not fun for me by the way. Derek was proud but I think I'll leave the bartering to him from now on. We napped a ton and ate a ton and did exactly what we came to do... nothing. When the sun did finally come out for our last 3 days we wasted no time. I laid out and read my new book "The Story of the Jamican People" and Derek played in the unusually rough Caribbean waves. I played in the water some but I really just wanted to come back from our Honeymoon with a tan which I achieved :) Derek came back the most sun burnt he'd been in years. The last 2 nights of our honeymoon I rubbed aloe all over his lobster red back and chest. He is just now getting to where it doesn't hurt anymore and I've since embraced my duties of wifehood in scratching the dead skin off my husband's back every night before bed. Romantic, huh? Anyway back to the honeymoon; on those few sunny days I convinced him to play beach volleyball, which I think is the culprit for the sunburn, and horseback riding, which I'll come back too. He convinced me to go snorkeling. Now, if you know me very well you know that I have an unnatural fear for anything that lives in large bodies of water. Yes, I know fish don't hurt when they bite but it's always unexpected and they are slimy and squirmy little creatures. I'm proud to say this fear doesn't stop me from enjoying the lake back home, it didn't stop me from being a lake beach lifeguard for years and yes, I do still swim in the ocean. However when one goes snorkeling you see these lively creatures out and about in their own habitat and even get to swim with them. The only comforting aspect is that I could actually see them so there would be no surprises. We got on the Sandal's boat and it took us out to the reef. They gave brief instructions and people fearlessly jumped in the choppy ocean waters. I was shaking and my belly was turning as I put on my snorkel gear but I tried my best to hide it. I actually jumped in before Derek with the help of the instructor but once Derek got in I did not leave his side, infact he held my hand the entire time. Sometimes I squeezed his arm as well. It was the most terrifying and amazing experience. The reef was beautiful and we saw tons and tons of colorful fish swimming only a few feet away, I made sure they stayed a few feet away too. The water was super choppy from all the storms on the previous days so it was hard steer ourselves. There were a few times we thought the waves might pick us up and drop us on the reef so we did our best to stay where the water was a little deeper. We even saw a stingray and Derek laughed at me for squealing through my snorkel which happened more than once. When it was all over I asked if anyone had ever gotten bit or stung snorkeling the guide laughed at me and said, "No, no worries princess, nothing will get you out here." I guess I didn't hide my fear very well after all. Derek said he was proud of me and I told him I promised I'd do it again on our next beach vacation.

Since it rained all week most of the Sandal's excursions were closed. We really wanted to do the "Island Vibes Cruise" where they take you out on a yacht and teach you reggae dance moves and then take you to another snorkeling destination and you dance and drink the whole way back; yeah sounds great. However the weather didn' cooperate and the day before we left was the only day we could do an excursion and the only one going out that day was the horseback riding; so we did it. We took a van to what seemed like the other side of the island but it was really just the other side of Monetgo Bay. The driver taught us all about the city and gave us some island facts on the way as well as explained the sites. I was a little shocked by the contrast in properties; there were some awesome mansions in the middle of shanties as well as neighborhoods of both. I have never been out of the country before and didn't know much about Jamaica so I took the opportunity to learn. I can't say I now know more than what is considered common knowledge to some but I know more than I did. As many of you know there is a lot of poverty in Jamaica and their average quality of life is not quite to the standard as ours here in the states which Derek and I pondered a lot on this trip. Some have the ability to improve their lives but don't seem to care to and others really excel despite the odds. We met some very well educated, diverse and generous Jamaicans on our trip, infact most we encoutered seemed to be so but we also stayed on the resort most of the time. When we left the resort the manners and quality of speech seemed to decrease along with the scenery. We came to understand this as different lifestyle choices, values, education, etc.. This nation is made of just as many different people as the U.S. and their motivations are as diverse as they are.
When we finally made it on the horses we were taken through rural Jamaica. It was beautiful and the trail was alittle bit more treacherous than a typical tourist trail here in the states. These people really trusted us with their horses. We all came out safe and sound and learned quite a bit about the plants and animals in Jamaica, such as there are very few snakes in Jamaican forests because back when they were under British rule and all the blacks on the island were slaves to sugar cane plantation owners, the Europeans brought mongooses over to take care of the snakes. So the mongoose over populated the snakes and now there are very few snakes. This put some minds to ease. After we finished the trail through the forests and a small village we took the horses in the ocean. This was a wild ride! The horses swam in water up to my chest height, while on the horse, and jumped between more shallow levels and land. It only lasted about 10 minutes but it was a good time.
We got back to the resort late in the afternoon and couldn't wait to enjoy the sunshine on the beach but most of all the fantastic grill food and drinks at the resort. We were spoiled with food and drinks the entire week. Each dinner we had a 5 course meal and each was the best we'd ever had. We enjoyed all different drinks all day and night, some of our favorites include; Humming Bird, American flag, Dirty Banana, Pina Coladas, Margaritas and our favorite a Jamaican Smile. We were spoiled but we were sure to enjoy it while it lasted and we even joked about returning home and going to our local bar and ordering a "Jamaican Smile". I'm sure we'd get some funny looks. The sunset was amazing our last night there and we tried to stay up late and go to the piano bar but like every other night that week we were in bed by 10 or close to it. So we never did the piano bar or the kareoke night or swim up bar either due to our exhaustion or the weather. We did however got lots of napping and drinking in which is exactly what we had in mind. :)